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translating influence into power

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[Wednesday, May 12th, 2010 @ 12:24am]
Every night now for the past four-weeks, I have been having these vivid, terrifying nightmares about an old boyfriend of mine from about six-years ago.

Unusual? Yes.

I haven't thought about him since.. well.. maybe since we broke-up July 2004. That's not to say that the dating/friendship/incompatibility that we shared together for six-ish months was 'insignificant', it mearly means that such a clean break-up meant that he's never crossed my mind.

That makes these fightening nightmares that much more spooky.
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[Saturday, October 24th, 2009 @ 9:05pm]
We've both turned 30 and buried the hatchet.
We even shared a package of Double Stuffed Oreo's on the couch at work.
Eating the middle before the cookie, like we used to 10 years ago.

I sometimes miss 1998, but it's so much more fun to look back on 1998 when temporarily re-visiting it.
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[Wednesday, September 9th, 2009 @ 1:11am]
I've been assisting inbound now for the last couple of weeks. It's been the most tiring experience of my life. Take stupid and then multiply it. I mean stupid. Like who wouldn't know that when you leave the country, you are subjected to roaming charges on a per/minute and per?kb unit? Compound stupid with: already received a call about excessive roaming. Compounded again by their whinny attempts to get me to give them a "discount" on their over-usage (amounting to $4,000) to "Help them clear their name"
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[Sunday, September 6th, 2009 @ 1:46am]
I don't think I am ever going to get tired of saying:

I'm officially a Harvard student.
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[Saturday, August 8th, 2009 @ 1:40am]
Sometimes I wonder why God put him on this Earth. If God did put man (and specifically this one) on this Earth to fulfill a purpose, then I have to ask: What purpose?

I'm sure there is one. And I'm sure he's been put here to teach me a lesson. Unfortunately for me, being the hopeless, wishful romantic, I'm just not getting it.

It's like there is the big neon sign flashing outside my bedroom window, saying "Dude's a loser" and I keep going back for more, or something. Not too sure. But God and said man have to teach me over and over and over again the same lesson.

It's getting tiring...

I guess the old saying rings truth... you can never change a person.. and you are who you are at 8, and will continue to be that same person (fundamentally) at 88.

That fucker.
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[Saturday, July 25th, 2009 @ 4:52am]
How do I live without you?

I've spent the last 11 years answering that question.
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[Thursday, July 23rd, 2009 @ 2:02am]
We finally sold the house. My allotment is more than enough to change my entire life. I already feel like a brand new person.

After what was our "first year of hell," Jason and I have managed to get through it all; with a much stronger marriage than many had originally suspected. We sacrificed a lot in 2008, and by far, it was a not a year of many happy memories. Heart attacks, car accidents, floods, fires and job issues, all posed huge detriments in our "think positive mentality"

2009 has been a much better year. I'm finally employed full-time in a job I love. Jason is working full-time and completing his MBA. And of course, we're now looking at buying our first home.

Suddenly I feel very grown up.

My ex and I are also on speaking terms. I never thought I'd see the day, but apparently its arrived. Now that we're working together, it's much nicer to not have silent and awkward elevator rides.
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[Thursday, June 25th, 2009 @ 11:51pm]
I'm on my Blackberry talking to my mother in law, when one of the neighbourhood unusals approached Jason to tell him in a frantic chaos "Michael Jackson is dead!"

Jason just starred at him strangely; I just walked passed him, hoping to ignore him.

But it was true. Michael Jackson is dead!

I always thought of MJ as my generation's Elvis. And his death is reminder that to any of us, our time can come just suddenly- just like that.

It's a very strange feeling-
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[Thursday, June 25th, 2009 @ 1:56am]
I've been home sick now for three days. Three very awful, painful days.
At this time, I am appreciative of: health benefits, dental care coverage and paid sick days.

I had a funny little incident last week where my left lymph node by my ear was incredibly large- like a toonie.

By Monday of this week, I had woken up in the morning in tears. And with various forms of frozen food on my face, I was planning my next move- to grab a steak knife and begin carving away various parts of my immune system.

The trouble was not with the swollen and sore node. Everyone who reads this blog knows darn well that I have been suffering from a crappy overactive immune system since at least this time last year. The problem was the incredible amount, and increasing intensity of pain that was caused to my entire left side of my mouth. The anology I told the doctor and dentist fits best: If I were a cartoon, Stewie Griffin would be pulling out my teeth using needle nose pliers and upon release crude oil would come gushing out of my wounds.

The pressure was so intense in my jaw that I was, honestly, a threat to myself.

The emergency dental dude told me my teeth were fine and that there was no infection. The doctor at the clinic (the next in a series of responsible steps to take), told me that I had an infected canker, possibly strep, and hooked me up with antibiotics, antibiotic mouthwash and T3s for the pain. He had also asked me whether I had `health insurance`and my response of yes has likely played in having me `had` so speak.

Hoping that it would all go away all by itself earlier Monday, I had made an appointment with my family doctor and with my regular dentist. My family doctor looked inside my mouth this morning and told me I was full of crap, and that she could not see an infection. My dentist told me the same. She did however tell me that those four wisdom teeth are likely the source of all my problems and that they`ll be removed out of my mouth, like it or not, by August.

Getting time off for a major surgery when there are Welcome Calls to be made, should be interesting.

In the meantime, I am keeping myself pleasantly high. And I have to admit, the world is far nicer place a bit fuzzy
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[Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009 @ 6:59am]
That man yelled at me for a straight hour.
At first I wanted to kill him. An hour later and I wanted to kill myself
"Did you write it down? Write it fucking down-problem #1" As he just screamed at me.
I was only calling him to welcome him to the network. I really wasn't in the mood to listen to his incredible insecurities and poor judgements being lashed out on me.
Like for ffs, don't fricken blame me for a plan you chose for your kid that is certainly not going to meet his needs and then make that into my g-d damn problem. You're the fucking account holder, with all due respect, take some god damn iniative to solve your own dilemma.
I went through every stupid line of his e-bill, because he's a retard.

Oh and if you think that's special.... how about the stupid jerk who was tethering from his BB to his laptop and then screamed at me because his bill came in a box.

How do these become welcome calls, I don't know.
How do you miss 4,000 dollars of charges on your acct? Beats me.

THEN... I get home, wanting to do nothing more than watch some sexy Will Smith onDemand,and my stupid box stops working. So I come home from an 8-hour day at Rogers and then have to call Rogers- LAME. Girl was so unhelpful, granted it was like 2am and our call was disconnected. So I called my ex,"Help me fix my box." Of course the pervert that he is, laughed at me.

But box was fixed and I sat to enjoy a million cigarettes, a partially home cooked meal and some yummy alcohol (for which I only moderatly indulge in, when absolutely necessary).

I also wripped my jeans today, lost my badge and missed the bus.

It's 7am. Bedtime.
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